Hallelujah!

The last two days have been really hard on me I had to stop taking my medicine because my body was reacting badly to it and will begin it again tomorrow at a half dose. Yesterday was a really hard day pain wise, I have been having random chest pain that has been going on for about a month however two days ago it became constant and last night it became more than I could bear. I called first nurse and she said I needed to go in.

So my faithful roommate took me in to ER yet again, it has been a couple months since my last visit so we were doing pretty well! They did blood tests, x-rays, and an EKG and everything came back normal. I still hold my record of never being admitted to the hospital...which I am pretty proud of :)

Hallelujah means praise ye the Lord, a shout of joy praise or gratitude. 

All I can say right now is hallelujah, my hope and strength is in Jesus Christ and because of that I can survive. It is so hard not knowing what wrong with me and being told that everything is normal about my body because I know its not. I have been comforted by these verses.

2 Corinthians 4:7 We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God not from ourselves. 

Psalm 91:11-12  For He will give His angels charge over you to guard you in all your ways. They will bear you up in their hands that you do not strike your foot against a stone. 

I am so weak I have no strength to fight. God puts air in my lungs and He keeps my heart beating, He gets me out of bed in the morning and He fights for me. He is my strength. I am nothing and have nothing without Him. He has given me a hope that no doctor or test result can take away, I have the hope of heaven. One day I will die, I will leave this earth and on that day I will feel no pain because I will have a perfect body. Oh how I long for that day! I can live the rest of my life in pain because I know the hope and peace that Jesus Christ brings.

Hallelujah To My King 

Oh what peace the spirit of Jesus Brings

Through the trials He will carry me, 

One day in Heaven our eyes will meet

Filled with wonder, all the saints will sing

Hallelujah what a savior!

I owe everything to Him

Hallelujah what a savior

Hallelujah to my king! 

(This is a stanza of the song if you would like to hear more click on the link) 

However long I am in pain I know that God will give me just enough strength to endure it, not too much and certainly not too less. He is a God who willingly and gladly meets our needs.

Prayer Requests: 

*That my hope will not be in the lymes disease test

*That I will cling to the Lord in all circumstances 

*That I can keep up and sit through my classes

*That my body will accept the medicine

Let us keep pressing together. 

Full Dosage

Yesterday was my first day taking all of my medicine, for the last week every day I have added a new pill and finally am at my full dosage! The medicine still makes me sick, it messes with my organs and brings about random other pains, but it is not near as bad as the first time I got sick on the medicine in St. Louis. Mornings tend to be worse than any other time of day but if I sleep till eight or nine my day gets a lot easier.

Another thing that helps my day is water therapy, I get the opportunity to go in three times a week for water therapy and hot tub time. I can live with this pain forever if I have a hot tub! haha I don't know why heat feels so good but it really helps.

Prayer Requests:
*My memory is still pretty bad and school starts up again today, pray for grace in my schoolwork that I will meet deadlines
*That the medicine would become easier and easier to take everyday

Bad Days Better

Have you ever heard the saying it has to get worse before it gets better?  Well, this happens to be one of those times in my life. As you know they found that I have parasites and my doc decided not to mess around this time, he has put me on very intense medicine to get rid of them. 

Usually when you are on medicine it is hard on your body and this is no exception. My doctor said that during this process of getting the parasites out the symptoms I have experienced throughout this spout of pain will come back, and more than likely worse.  I found out my doctor was not joking, as soon as I took my first set of medicine my abdominal pain was back. I was also very hot and nauseous, I was thankful that mom and I decided to stay another night in St. Louis and we weren't on the road at the time. 

There are six different pills I am taking three of them I take for three weeks then I am off a month. (These are the ones that are really hard on me) The other three I take for three months I only took them once before my doctor took me off of them to get the other three in my system first, so we will see how I react to those later in the week. 

Prayer Requests:
*That my body would accept the medicine
*That the effects of the medicine would be tolerable
*That I would trust the Lord through the process and rely on His strength not my own

Psalm 46:1-2a God is our refuge and strength a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear...

Exodus 14:13-14 'Do not fear! Stand by and see the salvation of the Lord which He will accomplish for you today; ... The Lord will fight for you while you keep silent.'

These are two verses that I have clung to the last couple months, I serve a God who not only fights for me but who is my strength and my refuge. I can do nothing without my God and I have confidence He will see me through this phase of life just has He has seen me through every other. 

Thank you for your prayers! 

St. Louis & ... snow?

My mom and I woke up to a white surprise of snow this morning in St. Louis! The weather was forecasted to be in the 50's however it's a blizzard all day. I didn't even bring a coat! woops! We are in St. Louis for my Dr. Yu appointment which was this morning, the appointment went well there are a couple things Dr. Yu found wrong. 

I have an infection in my jaw from when I had my wisdom teeth removed, my sister had this problem as well and is doing much better after her surgery. I still have parasites, I was treated for parasites almost two years ago now but they either came back or never fully left. I have been put on a really intense set of pills to get rid of them, I will be on these for three months so prayerfully it takes care of the problem. 

We will be headed back to St. Louis April 18th for a follow-up with Dr. Yu along with surgery for my jaw. Also there are some tests that are in the works right now and one is for Lymes Disease, soon we should know if that is an issue that needs to be addressed. 

Mom and I decided to stick it out down south and not to mess with the roads, they are not too good at plowing down here so we are having girls night in with pizza and popcorn! We will be headed back to Iowa first thing in the morning. 

Prayer Requests:
*Grace in how my body accepts the medicine, that it would go smoothly
*That this medicine would take care of the parasites
*Safety traveling home tomorrow
*A successful surgery in April
*For the lymes disease test results

Lastly, the church I attend, Walnut Creek Community Church/The Downtown Church has a team of 55 people in the Dominican Republic on a mission trip right now, please pray for their health that they would remain healthy and to be lead to soft hearts ready to hear the gospel. If you would like to keep updated on their experiences click on this link... Mission Updates. 

Have a blessed day!

Home Again

I arrived home last night from Florida.  I went to Florida because we have family there and heat eases my pain so I had a great week with limited pain. I was even able to walk quite a ways on the beaches pain free which was beautiful and fun. My break from doctors and therapy was wonderful but now its time to jump in again.

One thing I found really interesting is my memory was perfect in Florida and as soon as I got in Des Moines I couldn't remember things and had a hard time finding words again. I thought that was weird how quickly that had come and gone again. If only Iowa had Florida weather my body would be a happy camper :) 

I had water therapy this morning and will continue to have it three times a week, the therapy is like a little piece of Heaven in Iowa, the pool its in is around 90 degrees and after my session I chill in the hot tub for a while. It is so nice and refreshing! I have decided if I have pain long term I am getting a hot tub! My pain always turns around after some time in the water. 

My next doctor appointment is on Monday in St. Louis please be praying:
 *The Lord would lead the doctors in a treatment or who to go to next
 *Safety in traveling
 *That I wouldn't get worse before I get better (and if I do, strength to endure it)

Florida Sun

I have graduated from another doctor! This term my parents and I began using whenever a doctor would pass us on to someone else because they were out of ideas for my 'special' case. Before we left for Florida I graduated from two doctors in Des Moines, they have recommended me to go to my doctor in St. Louis and a new doctor in Kansas City. My mom and I are headed to St. Lewis on March 13th to visit Dr. Yu and are discussing when to head to the new doctor in Kansas City. 

So while we wait my mom and I are in Florida visiting our family and enjoying the warm weather. While we have been here my mom and I have been to many different beaches and seen some beautiful sunsets and coastlines.

 My mom and I at Clearwater Beach 

 Sunset at Green Key Beach 

A boy ran through the birds I though it looked pretty sweet with the sunset :) 

 Aunt Katie and I at Clearwater

Uncle Kevin and his new pelican friend

This has been our week-family, food, beaches and sun! All these pictures are at/after sunset when we started getting cool breezes but the weather has been upper seventy's all week, it has felt wonderful to my achey  bones :) Its been such a different vacation but a much needed time to re-coop physically and spiritually before headed back to new doctors. 

Have a wonderful day! 

Broken Bones

Have you ever realized that God does not need us? I realized last night that God does not need me, with or without me He remains the same. It is I who need Him. The last week or so has been pretty rough, I didn't understand why I was having pain and the pain was getting to be more than I could bear. Now I realize that that is the point of pain. 

"If you are Gods child and you humbly recognize and admit that the battle with sin still rages in your heart, then tell yourself that those difficulties are the sure sign of his rescuing and redemptive grace. God hasn't forgotten you. He hasn't turned His back on you. He isn't punishing you in anger. He surely isn't withholding the grace that He has promised from you. No you're receiving grace, but its grace thats willing to break bones in order to capture and transform your heart." 

~Paul Tripp 

Psalm 51:8 Make me to hear joy and gladness, let the bones which you have broken rejoice. 

We go through circumstances in our life that are difficult but we are called to rejoice in them, to delight in weaknesses. Why? Because they are a sign of our salvation. It is a sign of a God who is active in our life and desires what is good for our life to the point that He will cause pain to perfect us. He does not need me, I need Him. 

My family here in Florida is big into American Idol and they have me hooked this season...one of the guys sang this song last night. Check it out it is all about our need for the Lord. 

I need you now by Smokie Norful 

Our God is one of a kind, you will never find anyone like Him so never let Him go but remember if you do, His arms are always open and in that we can rejoice!

Three States One Day

I have arrived safely in Florida! It has been a pretty funny day I headed out a 5AM and took a detour west to see the Colorado Mountains. Although I was only there for two hours it proved to be good homework time :) I had a large project due tonight and as of about half an hour ago it is finally complete! 

The plane rides went well, the seats were so much smaller than I remembered, the last trip I took was overseas and I guess you get bigger seats when you travel out of the country. Anyway the trip was easier than in high school, when I came for treatment last time I thought I wouldn't make it to Florida, this time was easier but when I arrived in Tampa and met up with my uncle and cousin I started having abdominal pain again. Not exactly sure what its from but will be watching it so it doesn't get worse.

Mom and I were welcomed to a seafood dinner :) For those of you that know me I am not a fan of sea food however my whole family LOVES it! No joke, however in my defense I always try the food I just don't like it. Well I think my taste buds are changing again because I actually enjoyed most of the food I ate not only the crab legs...I actually ate two pieces of shrimp! 

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I am reading the book The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis and I really loved a point he made in it today. "The Church is the Lord's bride whom He so loves that in her no spot or wrinkle is endurable (Eph. 5:27) Love, in its own nature, demands the perfecting of the beloved."

What a beautiful picture, the Lord desires perfection in our life it is why we go through emotional and physical trials. But this is my favorite part,  "Of all the powers he forgives most, but he condones least; he is pleased with little, but demands all" C.S. Lewis.  God sees everything about our life, every good thing and every nasty sin in our lives. He is the one I offend but He is the one who always forgives, God is pleased with us when we come to him, but He asked for our all He desires perfection for our life. 

I believe this life is a process of working to give God our all, I know I grow daily closer to the Lord through reading my bible and prayer. The Lord will never grow old to us and we will never grow old to Him we will always be His beautiful bride.